Reflection on what I Value

Normally I do not write about my “word of the year” until the time arrives to close one year and begin the next. But I find myself wanting to talk about this word today, a rainy Sunday morning in Izmir. We are in great need of rain and I am enjoying the mood and atmosphere. This afternoon Fatih and I will host friends at home to watch the Goztepe vs. Alanyaspor soccer match. But this morning I have enjoyed my coffee, done the laundry, and prepared my salad for the week. Now I have some time and thought I’d pause and share some thoughts with you.

Update: I wrote that last Sunday–this Sunday it’s not raining, but I’m enjoying a quiet and relaxed morning with coffee and the cats. Fatih is on a bus to Istanbul to attend the Goztepe Away match this evening. I will go to his parents’ apartment to have dinner and watch the match with Mehmet and Emine.

This word–Value–has subtly integrated itself into my life this year. Perhaps it started with the fact that I spent much of my summer here in Türkiye, and in Izmir for the most part. I only visited Dalyan twice this summer–once in July with Kyla, and then in August on my own before I returned to work. There were two reasons for this. First is the reality that the cost of rentals in Dalyan has gone up significantly, especially considering the fact that I like to rent for 2-6 weeks a place that allows cats so that Jinx and Ziggy and come with and enjoy their own little holiday. I couldn’t justify spending the money when I have a beautiful and comfortable home here in Izmir that includes a catio for the girls. Secondly, my boyfriend, Fatih, is here in Izmir and he can’t often get away for more than a few days because of his work. 

As the summer wrapped up I decided I wanted to institute some new boundaries and lifestyle adjustments. For the past two years Fatih has stayed over increasingly more. I love having him here, as do the cats. But he does not adhere to a regular routine or sleep pattern, due in large part to the severe sleep apnea which he wrestles with (I continue to try and convince him of the need to seek treatment–that’s a work in progress). After two years of a lifestyle that had me not getting good sleep regularly, nor exercising on a regular basis, I appealed to Fatih and requested some adjustments as I wanted to place greater value on my health.

For two months now there are no longer “school night sleepovers” and when we meet up on a school night I wrap things up at 11 PM and get myself to bed. While I definitely miss seeing him more often, but these changes have had great impacts. I am getting to bed at a regular time and I am exercising most mornings. The changes to sleep and exercise have also had impacts on my diet. I’m doing intermittent fasting and have made some improvements in food choices that are also having healthy impacts on my body and mind. This all feels really good!

Part of the desire to make this change was a result of accepting my ankle situation. My left ankle has had multiple traumas and at some point I will have to have arthrodesis surgery (ankle fusion). A doctor back in April told me this, but he didn’t explain why. Over the summer I did research and found an orthopedic doctor who speaks fluent English and went for a second opinion. I started with Dr. Onvural in August. He reviewed my MRI and showed me ALL the things wrong with my ankle–cartilage, tendon, ligament, and bone damage/impacts across the decades. It started back in high school with sprained ankles playing volleyball. I broke my leg when I was 18, and there are impacts from those surgeries. And the list goes on.

In the end, there is no way to turn back time and get “back to scratch.” He agreed that at some point I will need the surgery, BUT there are some steps I can take before that endgame to improve my quality of life. Until August I was living with pretty significant pain in my ankle and often found myself limping because of it. Thanks to two supplements (Hyalix–hyaluronic acid; Inflamax–curcumin for inflammation and pain) I am experiencing about 30% of the pain I used to. My quality of life has greatly improved. I went for a checkup this past week and my liver and kidney function are all in the healthy range (we wanted to be sure my body was processing the supplements in a healthy way). I will continue on this treatment plan indefinitely. If the pain increases or returns then we will add injections of hyaluronic acid directly into the ankle. Last stage and endgame is the arthrodesis surgery.

While I have always valued my health, I took a little detour the last two years and got sidetracked by love and fun. 🤩  Don’t be sad, I still have PLENTY of love and fun; I’ve worked to find the balance. I am still head-over-heels in love with Fatih; We still have tons of fun when we are together, and with old friends and new friends alike. But I am enjoying the benefits and comfort of moderation in more arenas of my life. I feel more focused and prepared for my teaching and other professional endeavors. I feel more at peace and comfortable these days.

I haven’t been doing Turkish language lessons since last March. Not because I don’t want to learn and grow in Turkish, but because I was busy in the spring doing an online course for ISTE certification (International Society for Technology in Education). This fall I am at work on a Portfolio which I will submit in hopes of becoming an ISTE Certified Educator. To be honest I think it will be a stretch to achieve as my current role and school create some limitations to achieve the 24 criteria in authentic ways. I can definitely achieve 17-18 of the required 20; but there are a few that may not be achievable. BUT the most important result is that I am reinvigorated about profession. The coursework and creation of the portfolio have caused me to participate in professional networks and learn new resources, tools, and strategies which have been making me a better teaching librarian. Because of my involvement in some professional networks I also found a librarian conference in Amsterdam that is held the week of our Spring Break. I am registered for the conference and have booked my hotel and flights. I am looking forward to networking with colleagues from across Europe.

As you can see, I have been valuing my health, my romantic relationship (we celebrated two years together on October 6th), and my career this year. But there is more.

I am relishing the Value of simply BEing in this time and space and age. The world seems a mess and full of discord, war, and chaos. America, like so much of the rest of the world, is regressing instead of progressing. The more I watch my home nation fall into disrepair and degredation, the more I enjoy quiet moments of reverie during which I am grateful for this life I have built here in Türkiye–for my beautiful and unique apartment, for my meaningful work at ACI, for the collection of friends across the globe, for my family members, for my health (though that is nuanced), for Fatih (the best boyfriend I’ve ever had), and for my lovely kitties, Ziggy and Jinx.

Life is good in this day and age and I want to feel and know that–know the VALUE in pausing to reflect and notice what IS working and what IS going well in this moment. There are so many things that I Value–Family, Friends, Romantic Partner, Health, Profession, Pets, Home, Reading, Writing, and Time to enjoy and appreciate each and every one of those elements of this one and precious life I have the joy of living and creating. I also Value YOU as a friend and reader who takes a moment to read my thoughts and sharing. I hope it gives you delight and causes you to pause and reflect on the beauty and value within your own life. Please feel free to comment and share your reflections here. I hope you are enjoying a lovely weekend with those people and things which YOU value. Take care!